Today was the second of the open door retreat mornings. We started by sharing where our prayers have taken us this week which I expected to be straightforward, but what poured out of me was anxiety and fear, I hadn't expected it to be so overwhelming right then.
The morning went downhill emotionally from that point and only thanks to God's arms round me did I manage not to completely break down. We were thinking about our creation as Christians, how we can experience God through our senses and each other and how we can pray. There was a testimony which moved me to my core and then two pieces of music which mean a lot from my childhood; memories and annies song. I was in bits; sobbing, nose running, tears pouring, wish I could run away bits.
Somehow I managed to make it to the end and then took the opportunity to make tea for everyone.
One of my friends, another retreatant, came and held me whilst I sobbed some more and managed to connect to the fear of going into the childhood stuff. It helped to know she understood, but boy am I scared of what the prayer and reflection will bring during the week!
1 comment:
Cyber hugs & prayers, Emma
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